Well. Good morning, Valley View. How are you all doing this morning? Man, Colby did a phenomenal job last week on this growth series that we’re doing, didn’t he? Let’s give him a shout out on that. So if you’re just getting here for the first time in the summer or want to know what’s going on, we are spending this month and talking about what it means to grow. So Colby kicked us off last week and today I get to jump in here. Pastor John sends his love. He is with his youngest son, Schaeffer. They’re having a really cool time together this weekend. Went away. Just spent some time with him. So, you know, one of the fascinating things that I find interesting with this time of year is looking on Facebook at everybody’s pictures of their gardens and their yards and the fruit and the produce. If you look at Keith’s yard over there, he’s always got like fresh vegetables. And it’s fascinating to me how people’s yards are all different. I live in the West End and if you know anything about the West End, of course the 1937 flood went through there. It that area used to flood it before they had all the levees and locks and things like that. So our soil is very rich. My parents’ soil, on the other hand, they live in South central Kentucky, has a lot of clay. And you look at both of them and you go, well, you should be able to grow here what you grow there. But that’s not the case. Different soils produce different fruit. So this morning what I want to talk about is what are the two biggest hindrances that I have seen with the body of Christ that hinder growth? Because if you know your soil, you know what’s going on in your heart, you’ll know what you can produce. Does that make sense? Okay, so the two biggest things that I’ve seen as a believer is disappointment and unforgiveness. Disappointment can lead to discouragement and lack of faith, while unforgiveness can create a barrier between you and God and others around you. The different soils in our spiritual life can be the very thing that hinders the fruit. See, my parents could try to grow the same stuff I grow in the West End. I got banana plants, I got, I don’t know, I’m not a, plant expert, but they can’t grow those where they live. The soil they deal with is that it’s clay. And if they, it just creates more challenges on trying to produce the same kind of stuff. So this morning we’re going to jump into the story of Joseph. And we’re going to highlight the very things that he walked through and how that applies to our life, walking through disappointment and unforgiveness. And if I asked you right now around the room, how many of you have forgiven someone? Most of y’all could raise your hands. But if I’m going to ask you at the end of this message, are there still some people you need to forgive? We’ll give an opportunity for that also. So we’re going to kind of summarize Genesis 37 kicks off Joseph was 17 years old. If you open your Bibles today, I’m going to kind of summarize, and then we’re going to jump over to chapter 40. Joseph, 17 years old. He’s the favorite son. Can I just tell y’all parents one little thing I’m learning? Don’t have a favorite. It just creates a headache because, you know, the youngest is always the favorite. I was the oldest, so we got the most consequences. So I understand how this really works. Joseph, the youngest, 17 years old. His father loves him, gives him a coat, coat of many colors. He’s that brother that goes around, does no work, nothing, and just kind of, hey, mom, dad, brothers aren’t doing this right. Mom, dad, they need to do this different. Mom, dad, I mean, parents, we deal with that already with the way my my, you know, youngest tattles on the middle that then tells on the old, you know. So that’s Joseph. So his brothers are like okay, we’ve had enough of it. Oh and let’s throw in there too. Joseph has a supernatural gift of dreams, and he likes to share those with the siblings. That doesn’t go over really well. Hey, I had a dream that you all were bowing to me. Doesn’t go over really well. So his brothers are like, let’s kill him. Let’s get rid of him. Then an opportunity comes up where they can sell him to some traders that are going through the area. So they do that, they sell him. He ends up in Egypt. He ends up being sold to one of Pharaoh’s head people, Potiphar, and he then gets in this place where he thrives in Potiphar’s house, but then has to… Fight off the advances of his wife. And then what happens? He ends up in jail. How many of you ever felt like everything I try to do right for God, I end up on this end? I end up like on the short end of things. Every time that I try to make a stand or do what’s holy or do this, something bad happens. So where I want to pick up is this is Genesis 40, verse 12. Here’s Joseph, he’s in prison. And while he’s in prison, the Lord promotes him and open doors happen and blessings happen. And he gets he gets to be over certain prisoners. And one day, two prisoners come to him and say, hey, look, we had some dreams. We don’t know what’s up. The cupbearer was thrown in prison and he shares this dream. And Joseph interpreted. Then the baker shares his dream. Joseph interprets that the dreams were. Joseph interprets, predicting that the cupbearer would be restored in his position, while the baker would be executed. And exactly. That’s what happened and [Genesis] 40. Verse 12 says this this is what dreams mean. Joseph said. The three branches, which represents three days, within three days, the Pharaoh will lift you up and restore you to your position as chief cupbearer. And please remember me and do me a favor. When things go well for you, mention me to Pharaoh so that he might let me out of this place. For I was kidnaped from my homeland of the Hebrews, and now I’m here in prison. But I did nothing to deserve it. I want to hang out here for a minute. I personally believe in all of Joseph’s story. This had to be the hardest season of his life. Because it was two years later before the cupbearer ever said anything. Two years later. Think about that. Joseph here, you know, he’s like, man, life’s been rough. Things have been hard. I’ve been sold into slavery. I tried, you know, Potiphar’s wife, tried to try to seduce me. I said no and end up in prison. And two years and then these dreams comes his. Sometimes later in Scripture doesn’t give us the timeline. Sometimes later, he interprets these dreams. He kind of starts thinking, Okay, well, maybe things are going to work out. Maybe I’m going to get out of this situation. Maybe it’s going to get easy. Maybe I will get out of prison. I can return to my home. But then it was two over two years later. Hope deferred makes the heart sick. Proverbs 13:12. I have seen so many believers go through a disappointment, and it be the very thing that hijacks their life or derails them. I grew up playing sports all my life. Playing basketball, baseball, soccer. But basketball was was my go to sport. I’ve broken my ankles. I’ve broken toes, I’ve dislocated fingers, all kinds of injuries. And all of them, for the most part, have healed back. Right? Except one. I was playing in a basketball tournament in college, and I tore my shoulder and I dislocated and tore it. I quickly set it in, but I never went through the proper process for it to heal back right. In so many times our hearts can be the same way. See, I can, I can right now. I’m not going to. I can pull it in and out of socket because it didn’t heal back right. And so many times our hearts can be the same thing. We go through a disappointment and things just, you know, it didn’t work out the way I thought it was. This didn’t happen the way I was praying it was going to do. I had planned for this and this didn’t work out and this didn’t happen. And then what happens is instead of healing back normal, instead of believing for God to do the things that he’s promised, promised in His Word, promise for our family, what he’s spoken over our lives, just maybe he will. Maybe he won’t. And what sometimes even happens is we even twist our theology and our perspective of him so that we don’t feel that disappointment again. Even yesterday, I dealt with something. Adrienne and I dealt with the situation, and I was like, really, God, the day before, I’m going to speak on this. I was so mad. I really was like, no, no, no, no, no. And it was somebody that we were working with on a situation and they did a 180 on us. Oh, and I was like, no, not before I speak on this. I had to deal with my own heart. It took me yesterday afternoon and all morning to deal with my heart because. I don’t want to heal back unhealthy in my heart with that hurt. And what happens a lot of times is this disappointment leads to despair. Despair leads to withholding, withholding trust, withholding love, withholding worship. That’s why sometimes on Sunday mornings, we do songs like defender, refiner. There. So that the Spirit of God, the Holy Spirit, can come in and gently massage your heart in the places of disappointment so that you can lift up praise and adoration from a healed perspective. For me, yesterday I was getting over a little bit of sickness. I had to get on the bike and just go for a ride just to work some stuff out with the Lord. And then this morning I had to hide in my office and just worship through it because I was like, God, I don’t want to withhold anything from you, and I don’t want to withhold anything from others, and I want to be able to trust you, and I want to be able to obey you. But if I don’t let you heal this area of my heart right, I’m going to add disappointment. And I’m going to take my expectation of you moving in my life. I really believe there’s different ones of you in here that have been through really hard situations. And you’ve stuffed the emotion. You’ve stuffed the pain. And guess what? The soil of your heart isn’t allowing the fruit to come forth that you were called to bring. Because it needs some tender love and care from the Holy Spirit to come in there. And I get it. It’s hard. It hurts. But there’s a loving father that wants to show you that you can trust him. I believe the two years while Joseph waited were also his refining years. I believe that was the time that God was like, look, man, I have something for you, but we’ve got to deal with some stuff. It doesn’t say that. That’s Andrew’s interpretation. Let me make clear that’s my interpretation there. Those were the times where he’s like, look, I’ve got plans for you. Those dreams you had, those hard to come forth, but you need to be refined so that you can handle that. You need to have a healing of your heart. And we’ll see that in just a minute. How that how that actually did take place. But I believe those were the critical times. And can I just tell you this morning too God wants you to heal from disappointment. God wants you to heal from disappointment. One of my best friends called me last week. His sister died from cancer and we’d been praying and standing together. He sent me in the text afterwards he goes, I need to call you later to process it. I said, absolutely, because he has seen people healed from cancer. He has prayed and watched miracles take place. Why did his sister die? I don’t know, it’s okay to say I don’t know, but I know my friend and we’re going to process that truth together over the phone, and we’re going to remember the truth of who God is, that he is a healer. That even when we don’t understand what’s going on, we can stand on the truth, even when it doesn’t make sense. We can stand on the truth. Even when it doesn’t feel good. We can stand on the truth because we want our hearts to be healthy and whole. We want the soil of our heart to bring forth fruit. We want to see the miracles happen. We want to walk up to the next situation and say, this might not have happend last time, but I’m standing and believing this time. Amen. All right, let’s jump over to Genesis 45. I love how this section right here really displays the transformation that happened to Joseph’s heart. Joseph could stand it no longer. There were many people in the room, and he said to his attendants, out all of you. So he was alone with his brothers when he told them who he was. Then they broke down and wept. He wept so loudly that the Egyptians could hear him, and the word of it quickly carried to pharaoh’s palace. I love that he’s like, look everybody out, everybody out, out, out! Leave me alone with them. Leave me alone with them. Could you imagine his interpreter? He’s. Let’s just visualize this. Here’s Joseph. He’s in Egyptian garb. He’s got an interpreter. I don’t know if they were speaking Hebrew or whatever. And he’s saying whatever to him, and he’s speaking to him. And then he’s just like, out, I want everybody out of the room. Leave me alone with them. I am Joseph, he said to his brothers, is my father still alive? But his brothers were speechless. They were stunned to realize that Joseph was standing there in front of them. Please come closer, he said to them. So they came closer and he said again, I am Joseph, your brother, whom you sold into slavery in Egypt. But don’t be upset, and don’t be angry with yourselves for selling me into this place. It was God that sent me here ahead of you to preserve your lives. This famine that has ravaged the land for two years will last five more years, and there will be neither plowing, no, nor harvesting. God has sent me ahead of you to keep you and your families alive and to preserve many survivors. So it is God who sent me here, not you. And he is the one who made me an advisor to Pharaoh, the manager of his entire palace and the governor in all of Egypt. Now hurry back to my father and tell him, this is what your son Joseph said. God has made me master over all the land of Egypt. So come down to me immediately, so you can live in the region of Goshen, where you can be near me with all your children and grandchildren, your flocks, herds and everything. I will take care of you there, for there’s still five years of famine ahead of us. Otherwise you and your household animals will starve. Then Joseph added, look and see for yourselves, and see my brother Benjamin, that I am really Joseph. Go tell my father about my honored position here in Egypt. Describe for him everything you have seen, and then bring my father here quickly. Joseph models for us six points of forgiveness. And I want to highlight these this morning. How do you know you’ve really forgiven someone? Again, I could ask and people would say, hey, you know, I’ve got a story or I’ve got this situation, I’ve got that. This morning I want to list six points from that passage of Scripture. Point number one, you don’t talk about what they did to you. That is the first. That you’ve know you’ve forgiven them. I mean, think about this situation. Here’s Joseph. He could have said whatever. He’s the prime minister of Egypt. He could have said whatever. No, he had everybody leave the room. Leave me alone. Because thinking about this, he goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah. Come on. Who’s, who’s the oldest sibling right here? Any oldest? Yes. Come on. We know we know when we can leverage a situation. We were the instigators. Joseph was like oh the tables have turned. The tables have turned. Nope. He had everybody leave. It’s been 22 years. He’s like, let me show you. Let me give you a little taste of the pain. No, he wanted nobody in the room, not even the interpreters. You don’t talk about what they did to you. That is the first unforgiveness. There are two exceptions. The first legal. If someone did a form of legal abuse or some other form of of anything illegal, you need to talk about it. Okay. Let me make that very clear. If there’s abuse, you need to talk about it. You need to deal with it. You need to report to authorities. And the second is if you have somebody to keep you accountable to point you towards truth. I know I’ve been through some situations, and I’ve had to share with a couple close people in my life to be reminders of truth, not plate, not people that you just vent and throw your stuff at. No, you need people that are going to be like, hey, let me point you to truth. Hey, this is how he’s handled the situation. God’s word. This is how you handle this. This way. This is how you handle that, that way. So the first sign that you know you have fully forgiven is you don’t talk about it. You do, however, talk about it to the Lord. Psalm 142 you pour out the pain of your heart to the Lord. He needs to be the first person you go to. I’ll be honest, I’m a verbal processor and a lot of times I want to just process what I’m thinking and what I’m struggling with. Before I go to the Lord. My wife reminds me that that’s not the way you do it, and I’m grateful she does. But I am a verbal processor. But I have to get that out to the Lord first. I have to express the pain. David does it all through the Psalms and that is what he wants to do for us. Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord. It’s not my job. You don’t talk about it. Point 2. Don’t let them be afraid of you. What did Joseph do? Hey! Come close, come close. Hey, hey. I’m. You know, come close. They’re like. Whoa, wait. What? We thought we got rid of you. No, come close. You don’t let them be afraid of you. When you have really forgiven you. Don’t let them be afraid of you. Spouses, husbands, wives. We can work on that when our spouse does something. Ooh, how we harboring that? How do we want to handle that? are there walls? Parents to children. Don’t let them be afraid of you. Hey, I’m speaking of myself on this, too, okay? So just. I’m not. I’m taking this in. I just spent a lot of time in prayer over this today. You don’t want them afraid of you. Point number three. You don’t tell them what they did. Boundaries are done in love. Walls are done in fear. If you tell them what they did, it’s in a safe [place] and the right time. Okay? My wife, Adrienne and I, we talk about that a lot of. Are you up to date on your forgiveness? There’s things I do that offend her and bother her. Probably all the time. My personality can be all over the place. She has to constantly forgive. I have to forgive. I’m human. I’m a parent. A lot of times it’s like we never bring up what we forgave about. We just forgive. We forgive. We trust the Lord with it. We forgive. We let it go. Joseph modeled that. He didn’t go, Hey, you don’t know where? No, he said, what did he say? Guess what? God sent me ahead of you. He didn’t even bring up prison. He didn’t bring up the accusations dealing with Potiphar’s wife. He didn’t bring up all the pain. He didn’t bring up all the trials, you know, bring up man. You don’t understand. I was in prison for this long. No, he said God sent me ahead of you. Isn’t this awesome? Point number four. You let them save face. Dale Carnegie’s book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, says that if you let another person save face, you’ve got a friend for life. You let them save face. I had a situation a couple of years ago. And, I was dealing with a leader. Nobody connected to Valley View. You would never know this person. So let me bring clarity there. I was, dealing with a leader that handled a situation poorly, and it was a leader that I had to interact with on a very regular basis. And the way they handled this situation, they handled it out of fear and just reacted. And it was a it was a very messy situation. And I remember in the process that the Lord was like, keep your love on, keep your love on towards them, keep your love on towards him. Love them, love them even when they’re acting out, even when they love them, love them. One day, eventually, later on, there was full reconciliation. And let me say this forgiveness and reconciliation are two different things. Okay? You have to forgive. It says you have to forgive and bless. But reconciliation looks different. If your best friend had an affair with your spouse, she probably should not go on vacation with him. But you do have to forgive. You have to bless. You have to let go. But in this situation that I was in, I had to forgive and I had to forgive constantly. But it required humility on the front end and humility on the back end. Because when the reconciliation process took place, eventually. I, I had to trust the Lord with the process and let the Lord handled it, handle it, because my nature would’ve been like, oh, see, I was right. You were wrong. But I had a choice. Did I want judgment or did I want revival in the relationship? And choosing revival in the relationship has brought long lasting fruit after that situation. The real issue becomes, how much do you want the presence of God? Don’t be surprised at the people that you really have to forgive down deeper. A leader, a pastor, a teacher, a coach, a parent, me, someone. But how much do you want the presence of God? How much are you longing for his presence? You don’t bring up the issue. You let them save face and you give them the opportunity to forgive themselves. You protect them against their offense, their darkest secret. You know God does that with us. His mercies are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness. He cast the sins as far as from the east to the west. He removes everything that we bring to him in repentance. So why do we want to do it with others? Why do we try to hold on to it? Why do we want to bring it up where it’s shaming? And total forgiveness. Point number six is a life sentence. It’s like a pill you have to take daily to live. How many times does it say in the New Testament you forgive? Say it. Yes, I remember I had a situation when I was a youth pastor. I had a kid in my youth group that was battling, a sexual addiction. He was seeing a therapist three times a week, was not getting any breakthrough. And I remember we got to talking and, I said, hey, tell tell me your story. His mom finally brought him to my office. We started talking like, what’s going on? What’s your story in conversation, found out that he was abused by his father. That’s what. Have you ever…ever forgiven him? Well, No, no, no. Okay. I said, can we invite Holy Spirit in and let me walk through that with you? I said, yeah, so we had a moment. We prayed together instantly free from sexual addiction. Six months later. I get a call, I’m struggling again, said, hey, what’s up? You know, where we at? He said, well, I had a I had a visit from my father I hadn’t seen in six months and everything kind of okay. He picked up that unforgiveness. Forgiveness is a life sentence. Forgiveness is an everyday thing. Jesus says in Matthew 6:14 – 15, if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others trespasses, neither will your father forgive your trespasses. The two biggest things that I’ve seen as a believer is disappointment and unforgiveness are the things that steal the growth of a believer’s life. Disappointment can derail the believer, and they lose the trajectory in the path that God has called them to. They lose the opportunity to step into the influence that God wants to put them in, because their heart stays in the place of disappointment and despair, and then they withhold, thinking they’ll never get out of that pit. And unforgiveness is the very thing that robs the soil of our heart. So here’s what I want to do this morning after listing those six things. You don’t talk about what they did. You don’t let them be afraid of you. You don’t tell them what they did. You let them save face and you protect against their secrets. Total forgiveness, again, is a life sentence. When you hear those six things, how many people would say, you know, someone comes to mind that I need to forgive? Someone comes to mind that I haven’t really fully released. Or on the other side, you may say, dude, you don’t know the pain I’ve been through. You don’t know the disappointment I’ve walked through. You don’t know the hardships I’ve been through. And my heart is still in that place and is never fully recovered. And let me just say, I know this is a very, very, very sensitive topic. It could be the loss of a loved one. It could be a divorce. It could be the list goes on. It could be a pastor that failed, a leader that failed. But if you’re here this morning and you want to say, hey, Lord. I’m. I want my soil of my heart to be good. I want the labor and the stuff that I put into it. The time I’m in the word to produce this fruit. But I’ve still got some stuff in there that’s hindering it. And you want to break that? Break free from that. I want to pray for you. So let’s go ahead and close our eyes around the room. If you’re here this morning, I’m going to I’m going to ask two questions. The first is this: If you’re here this morning and your heart still needs healing from a place of disappointment, raise your hand. Okay. All right. So a lot of hands. If you’re here this morning and you would say, Andrew. People are popping into my head that I need to forgive. Lift your hand. Okay, here’s how I want to handle this next, next moment. I’m going to pray for you in both areas. But if you raised your hand, nobody looking around. I’m going to ask you to just stand to your feet. Go ahead. Okay. Come on. Yes. All around the room. Come on. This is a moment between you and God. I’m not trying to conjure something up or manipulate you or anything like this. I care for you and want you free. Okay. So let’s pray into the first part first. Nobody’s going to know why you stood. This is between you and God. I’m going to pray over the disappointment area first, and then I’m going to have y’all repeat after me on the on the prayer forgiveness. Heavenly father. With your tender loving care come into our heart and heal the wounds of disappointment this morning. With your tender loving care come to the areas of our heart that we have faced disappointment and would you go there and minister to us? Would you show us how you’ve been with this through all the pain, all the heartache and all the frustrations? Would you please just show us this morning? We invite Holy Spirit, comforter into that to comfort our hearts. And we pray the balm of Gilead that would bring healing to those areas of our hearts. And our minds. This morning. You’re a loving father who doesn’t abandon or forget. So father, we pray over that right now. You’re tender loving care. Your mercies over every area of the heart. And if you’re if you’re here right now, there’s a there’s there’s people standing all around. Nobody’s looking around. If you if someone else has popped into your head, I’m going to give you five seconds. And you need to stand and forgive them. I’m going to ask one, two, three. Stand. If you’ve got to forgive someone. Four. Five. Okay. More people are standing. All right, here’s what I want you to do. I’m going to have you repeat after me. And then when I say the name of who you have to forgive, I want you to say it. You can say it quietly to yourself. I had to do this in my office this morning before I came up here. Okay? This doesn’t. It’s not right or wrong. Better than this is called life. This is called Christianity. This is what we do. We forgive. And even if it’s just the first layer this morning, the first part of the onion being peeled back, it’s that breakthrough. So I’m going to say, father, I forgive. And you repeat, father, I forgive. And then you say that name. Father, I forgive. You say the name. Repeat after me. The rest of it. Everybody in the congregation together. I trust you to handle that. Forgive me, in my judgment, towards that person. I trust you to handle it. I bless them and release them. Help me to forgive from my heart. Thank you Jesus. You can be seated. And the story of Joseph 17 years later, after his — I think it was 17 or 15 years later, after his father dies. His brothers come to him and go, hey, you’re going to get rid of us now, out of fear. Joseph’s like, no, I forgave you, I forgave you from that day forward. I got the really cool opportunity of spending time with the ministry team this week with Colby, Lauren, Pastor John and can I say that we care for this church so much and we want to see you grow. That was a big part of our conversation, and we want to see anything that hinders the love of the father from those areas of growth in our hearts. Amen. So when you leave today, I want you to just meditate on that – Lord, who pops into my mind that I need to forgive? And one time, and one thing too, that happens for me. Everybody’s different. Sometimes when I have forgiven someone, he shows me a picture. I see them differently, where he shows me something that I know, that I know that I’ve forgiven that person, and I’m going to believe he does the same for you this morning. So let me pray a prayer of blessing. Let’s all stand to our feet. I want to pray a prayer of blessing over this house. If you just want to receive, get in the posture position right now and let the goodness of the father be poured out on you this morning. So, father, I bless this house. I bless this house. I bless this house in the name of Jesus. I bless this house in the name of Jesus. Lord, we thank you that you care for us so much that you have your rod and your staff. One is there to correct, the other is there to protect. And Lord, we thank you so much that you love us so much that you would send your son so that we’d have a personal relationship with you. So right now, I thank you for this house, Lord, that you would bless this whole house coming and going. You would bless them financially. You would help remember and remove anything that is hindering love in their life, Lord, that they could be a blessing to the community, a blessing to their family. And so, father, we just thank you Lord for a complete blessing from heaven above. We love you, Jesus. Amen, Amen, Amen. Well, church family, we love you. Have an awesome day. We’ll see you next week. I’ll be down front if someone needs some more prayer. Love you all.